Who am I, What am I, Why am I?

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“I am a series of moods and sensations. I play a thousand roles”, says Anais Nin, a 20th century diarist. I played a thousand roles too, when I was doing drama as a GCSE. I then later auditioned for the main role on a school musical to only get the showgirl. Eye roll. I acted my heart out in class and I’ve never used that GCSE since then. However, in a way, I am, in my everyday life and in the digital world and so are you.

Goffman, in his 1959 book ‘Presentation of Self in Everyday Life‘, created the theory ‘impression management’ where he stated that we use certain words, wear certain clothes and behave differently depending on the situation and the individual (audience) we interact with so that we show the best impression there is. I mean, of course that would be the case if it was someone you had a crush on or you’re just chilling somewhere with your friends. Earlier theorists such as Burke, Hart and Burk offered a side on a person being a performer but Goffman was the first on developing a theory that spoke about self-presentation. He didn’t only look at his theory as a way of making an impact on someone/other people but also as to how people can interact with each other on a daily basis, a professional side vs. a private one. I have a different persona when I’m at home with my family compared to being outside and in university. Jokes that I say to my family will be well received than if I were to say it to my friends because they wouldn’t understand compared to my family. Goffman used the terms “front stage” and “back stage” to express this. Do you see the reference to drama? My past is creeping up on me.

Goffman took a lot of inspiration from theatrical production to give a way of understanding how humans converse and behave. People take part in “front stage” behaviour only when others are watching them. A role is played and is shaped partly for the correct setting, for example, we tend to laugh at something that is deemed funny or cry when something is sad and our physical appearance is also taken into consideration. The reason for someone acting this way can be on purpose or can be habitual. Either way, it normally follows a “routine” that has been shaped by cultural norms. Me walking around in university and saying hello to one of my lecturers is an example of this behaviour, I’m putting on this front that may not normally be how I act on a daily basis. This type of behaviour can tend to happen when you’re in a professional setting, with other students in a classroom or with colleagues from work. Whatever the setting is for front stage behaviour, people know how others perceive them and what they expect of them, hence the knowledge telling them how to act.

Back stage behaviour is what happens behind closed doors. When I come back from university, I am no longer this person who is hanging out in the library on my own during the break having lunch or studying there. I am someone who helps out with the chores, reads, hangs out with the family, eats Congolese food and dances and sings to KPOP. I feel more relaxed in this setting and it’s a setting that isn’t known by anyone else other than my family. My guard is down and my “true” self is shown. The word true is put in quotation marks because people may not decide that their true self is whoever they are at home but who they are when they’re outside or on social media. Goffman explains that when this behaviour is shown, any elements that show the front stage is casted off, including any clothing to be substituted with casual clothes or loungewear. When I get home from university, I put on my Christmas jumper with a grey Santa on the front with a red nose and a grey bobble (they’re turning grey because they used to be white) and my pyjama bottoms (also Christmas themed). Never too early! Goffman also said that the way of speaking and how we carry ourselves changes in back stage behaviour. Personally, I don’t think I change my way of speaking as much, the only difference is that I don’t swear at home (not with the family being there anyway). For someone on the professional side working in corporate, for example, they may, once they get home, start practicing for their front stage behaviour for the next day. You know, the smiling, the waving, handshakes, practicing for a presentation on climate change. Even on back stage, people are aware of the norms and expectations which influence what they do, what they they think about and what they say.

When someone forgets about the expectations needed for front and back, it can lead to confusion from the people they interact with and may lead to controversy and a bit of embarrassment. If I showed up to university in my Christmas jumper and pyjamas, yeah, there would be a few stares and people may even come up to me and ask why I’m wearing what I’m wearing. However, in university, people can wear whatever they want to an extent so that’s not a very good example. If I went back to my secondary school and did that, yes, there would be a bucket full of embarrassment from me as my former teacher(s) would see me and laugh which I wouldn’t like very much as I respect them a lot and I would like that reference for when I’m applying for jobs. I joked around a lot back then but still, respect.

Now let’s talk about how this aspect is put into the world of digital media.

In Haziq’s article on social media, she said that Goffman’s theory, despite him not living to see the internet begin, that he made reference to it and that the theory really helped in getting to know the ways of people using social media in this day and age. Now that social media has grown to become this phenomenon, more and more people are visible online. There are now ways of making sure that certain people can’t see what you post online. I know Instagram has this, where you can chose your “close friends“. They’re the only ones who can see what you post only on your Instagram story. There is also another setting that’s quite recent which is where you can have a “favourite” account(s) and on your home feed, you can only see posts that you’ve put in the category so that your feed isn’t blasted with people you may not be that interested in, even though you follow them. Or, just to make things simple, people just make brand new accounts and post stuff on there that they may not want their parents seeing when they check their devices. It makes them seem they’re more “sensible” then they seem. I’ve had Instagram for almost all of my teen years so I’ve seen it change from being able to see what other people like and comment in real time to reels.

When it comes to comments, boy, are they harsh on Instagram! TikTok is similar. Where something is positive, there are always an array of comments that start hating on the creator. I always see comments like that and think to myself, why are people so hateful and spiteful of someone doing good things or celebrating something great happening in their life. But then I remember that the majority of those accounts are either bots or accounts that have little following and no profile picture. I have two accounts but I’m not using them to be rude to people (I use one to stalk people). I’m nice (when I want to be). This is a great example of the impression management theory where people may have two accounts that show completely different sides to themselves. On the topic of profile pictures, my profile picture on Instagram is a nice picture my mum took of me on my 21st birthday. I didn’t put that there to gain attraction, it’s actually to help with my profile and just for contact from professionals. I also have a link to my website on there for the same reason as my profile photo. Majority of people put up these really sexual profile photos to attract. Women, for the male gaze and men for the opposite and they do it knowing that it’ll gain that attraction.

Another example of a social media platform that people can show off these two sides is Twitter (now known as X but who’s calling it that?). From what I know of Twitter, people can post whatever they want on there, there’s no filter like Instagram. It can be from someone blasting someone for something to a very explicit private part. The possibilities are endless! But now that Elon Musk bought the platform, he’s changing things up a bit. In terms of the professional side of things, most if not all journalists use the platform to discuss all things journalism. News spreads quickly and before you know it, everyone and your mother knows about it. What I find funny about Twitter is that when something is tweeted and gains attraction, on that same day or several days later, I can see that exact tweet on an Instagram meme page. Instagram has gone to the point where it’s just a reposting platform, you can see things from Reddit, Twitter, even YouTube. This platform, in my opinion, seems to be the most “carefree” in what you can post on there.

There are many other examples of media platforms that have this way of letting people be two or more different people at once. At the end of the day, we need to be “true” to the self that we proclaim to be. I’m staying true as Sarah Munsi, whether that’s me at school, me at home, or me on social media. I think I prefer myself at home, it’s what I’ve grown to love as I’m growing and learning as a young woman of society. Who are you staying true to?